When family means everything
30.04.2010
We have stories of people who selflessly devote themselves to caring for other peoples, who put others before themselves despite trying circumstances and who are shining examples of what loving your neighbour really means.
I was reminded of how far I still have to go by the example of a young woman from Thailand named Julia. We met her at our Columban-run Uijongbu Migrants Worker’s Centre in South Korea.
Julia arrived in Korea five years ago to earn money to support her family back home. Her circumstances at that time were unfortunate: her husband had come to Korea on a trainee visa, but had to return home after one month because of health problems. Unless a replacement could be found for him, Julia and her husband would forfeit the $6,000 fee they had spent to find him a job.
Julia decided to leave her 7-year-old son with her parents and come to Korea - she was now the breadwinner. She thought that the sooner she could pay off her husband’s debt, the sooner she would be able to send remittances home to support her family and younger sister and brother who were depending on her to get through college.
Julia never had the chance to go to college, so she was determined to give her siblings the opportunities she never had.
She told me her story from her hospital bed after having her right breast removed because of cancer. She was devastated by the mastectomy and her trauma was not eased by the medical bills that followed. I reassured her that the social services at the Catholic hospital where she was staying would be able to help.
The focus of her pity and concern, however, wasn’t so much for herself but for her family. ‘To whom could they turn now that she was sick?’ she asked.
Julia had just paid off the debt and was looking forward to sending money home when she was hit with cancer. The only words of comfort I could offer encouraged her to get well first and reassured her that everything else would take care of itself.
Julia’s prognosis was good and, according to the doctors, she would make a full recovery. But she didn’t stop thinking about her siblings and the fees that needed to be paid. I told her that together with the social services we could organise a fundraiser to help with the hospital bills.
I commended Julia for her bravery and selfless dedication and love for her family during a time of personal turmoil. She reminded me that her sole purpose was not for herself, but for that of her family. All she wanted was to recover and return to work.
I guess it was easy for me to suggest that if I was in Julia’s position that I would concentrate first on getting myself back to full health. Then I realised she had become the sole breadwinner.
Because of her undocumented status, I also thought Julia would be wise to avail herself of South Korea’s amnesty home without penalty if they voluntarily present themselves to immigration. But she said no! She wanted to stay and get well.
Her single-minded dedication to her family in the midst of such personal pain was indeed a shining example of what Jesus’ words of self-sacrifice and loving your neighbour really means.
I am happy to report that Julia has received a clean bill of health and is back working as a machinist in a sock-making factory. She is grateful to all her friends in the Uijongbju Migrant Worker’s Centre who have supported her.
Fr Patrick Cunningham is Director of Uijongbu Migrant Workers’ Centre in Korea.
