When in Pakistan

Monalisa [right] with friends. Photo: Columbans, Pakistan

When I arrived in Pakistan, I was struck by how it was such a very different environment. I sensed I had to be cautious all the time. People stared at me every time I was in public places. Going to the market, I saw men primarily in the restaurants, serving in the offices. Everywhere it was all men. In my mind, I wondered where the women are. It wasn't easy to understand at first, but as time went by, I started to feel confident and started to interact with the people around with the men especially. My years in Pakistan have been a blessing to look back on and savour all that has happened that influenced my being.

It was a bonus to have learnt new things about life and been challenged in my understanding of my womanhood. Being in a new society like Pakistan is always a joy and a challenge. Living with the women is one of the joyous things that mission has given me. But like the woman at the well, I have to have that courage to go beyond the people's culture with respect. It is a sweet challenge because it includes many dimensions to avoid hurting or going beyond the unexpected.

Sometimes when I think about the wedding season, I always wonder how young girls and boys will be able to survive at their young age. It's a culture like the one we once had back home. I recall similar stories of some of our elders on how they got married. One of my grandmothers once told me how young she was when our grandfather married her. Parents didn't oppose it at all. Instead, they freely allowed their daughter to be married at a young age.

Now that I am back in Pakistan, it's again the wedding season, and I have to embrace marriage again as that part of their life that is rooted in this culture.

Columban lay missionary Monalisa Esteban lives and works in Pakistan.

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